All posts filed under: Record

26: Reliable & Unpredictable

Another year. While stepping into my 27th year of walking on this earth, holding 26 years of days in my skin, I wander. I reflect on the love and support I’ve received, and I am grateful. I consider my achievements and failures, my work and my rest, and I am full. I forget the things so ordinary they have settled like silt, yet become the bedrock of me. I catch a glimpse of the monsters I’ve befriended, the demons still sullen, the stories I am sitting with, waiting on language for. I decide on how to be reliable and unpredictable at the same time: to hold trust to receive another life with integrity and grace to defy easy definition to shed expectations like dead skin to prevent the labels from boxing me in to remain a complete universe to surprise and wonder those looking for the ends and the means to wonder at the ends and the means to remember to pause at the bridge and catch the evening shadow of trees to walk the …

On No Engagement Ring & DIY Wedding Bands

In early discussions of getting married, I mentioned that I did not want an engagement ring, nor a proposal. Our relationship has always been one of meeting halfway, mutual compromise and agreement, and equal weight. So deciding to get married was an active decision-making process for the both of us, instead of an active-passive divide in roles. Passing on an engagement ring was also the most comfortable decision for the both of us, as diamonds and the messaging around them run counter to our values. That money is better used in savings, or in more thoughtful gifts for our wedding guests. Very early on, we also became interested in forging our wedding bands together, and eventually decided to go with The Wedding Band Workshop hosted by The Den. It was meaningful for us to personally shape the symbols of our commitment to loving each other, and go through the process together. We ended up with matching textured hammered silver rings. Functional, personal, with a little reminder on the inside that we all need the sabbath to sustain …