and then I decided not just to look fear in the face,
but to laugh with abandon.
so I crushed my chest into rubble,
waited on the moonlight to soften the ruin.
I burned the place down. I don’t know if I meant to.
and then I danced. on purpose.
I let my hair dry in starlight grown cold.
I waited long for a sign
but when it arrived, it crowded the view
so I burned it too,
to stay warm. to light the horizon. to have room for other reasons.
I am trying not to tell you if it was difficult or lonely.
I am learning not to have to tell all the stories.
just the ones for you to recall, decades from now, in the ends of
unnamed but familiar birdcall.
just for me. just for me. just for me.