I have never been fond of orange and yellow tones. My wardrobe is an overwhelmingly cool – neutrals palette, from the black-white-greys to the blue-purples.

A few years ago (in the era of the high-waisted skirt but before the crop top came back in), I decided I wanted to be experimental and bought a longer skirt that cut at my calves in a shade of orange I found bearable.

It was a failed buy at the time. I couldn’t figure out how to match it to anything in my wardrobe, nor did I enjoy the way it sat on my body and the silhouette it created.

I couldn’t really see it at the time and so I decided to throw it at the back of my wardrobe and forget about it.

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It survived multiple rounds of spring cleaning, I guess I felt that I had to wear it at least once before I donated it out, or that maybe someday I would grow into liking this length and this shape of a skirt.

However many years later (and I would estimate almost five), I have grown into it.
It started with the tank dresses, and the ankle length skirts I would pair with my tank tops or shirts.

It continued with the return of the waist length sweaters and shirts, and my foray into wearing loafers.

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One day I discovered that the orange skirt fit perfectly into my wardrobe, although it was one of just a few pieces I owned in a warm tone.

It matched to any number of black or white combinations, with a few different types of shirts and shoes, and it fit into my body.

What I mean to say (with all this rambling) is sometimes you have to take the long way around for something to fit.

Sometimes it takes years to understand that flash of foresight you had.

Maybe I didn’t think of it that way then, but purchasing that orange skirt was a little like catching a glimpse of my future self, and all I needed was time to become the person who would wear this skirt.

Some days the orange skirt feels like it belongs to a different person altogether. Some days I find that it has its place in my closet.

This tells me that the selves I am growing into are open to change, not really inconsistent, just still finding their footing.

The day I outgrow this skirt will be a whole other story.

Posted by:jasmine

Jasmine is an editor, poet, and community arts organizer. She comes to poetry by way of Chinese music. This blog is a mapping of ways.

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