I’ve always been a default T-shirt and jeans type of person.
Most of my childhood was spent in denim of all kinds, and T-shirts of many colours and cuts. Style-wise, it was never a stand-out type of combination, but it was reliable, comfortable, and always within the realm of acceptable trends.
I’ve diversified immensely from my 16-year-old wardrobe, experimenting and growing into different kinds of relationships with my changing fashion.
Perhaps a part of it was beginning to understand that I had some control over the way I walked in this world through the way I put myself together. I wanted to learn about this control, develop it, nurture it, and use it.
Sometimes we want to change ourselves to become more of something, to be more like the person we dream ourselves to be, to be the person we think will make us happy.
Sometimes it takes many styles, sets of outfits and changes to become the person that slips into a pair of jeans with ease. That person was always the person you were; you just didn’t know how to love yourself properly or accept yourself as you were.
Sometimes after many styles and sets of outfits, you never become the person you used to be. You decide to love the person you are now and let go of the things that you once thought defined you.
Most of the time it’s a bit of both.
Most days I think about myself as a series of shifting selves.
How do you look at a new year and decide what you want to make of it?
How do you anticipate the number of earthquakes, the amount of ruptures and reformations that will reshape your bones?
Maybe all you can really do is hope the seams in your clothing are strong enough to hold you while you grow.
Maybe in the end all you can do is watch yourself in the mirror become yourself in another way.
Maybe 2016 will just be same same, but different.